Which stage are you?
Twelve questions. Answer honestly. The condition can tell when you're lying, mostly because lying is a Stage 3 symptom.
// THE SIX STAGES OF VIBERPSYCHOSIS
A diagnostic framework for AI vibe coding addiction. Everyone is somewhere on this scale.
Typed "make me an app" into a browser tab and an app appeared. Showed it to your partner, who said "oh, nice." Posted it on LinkedIn with the word "game-changer." It had no backend, no login and no users. You have not closed the tab since.
Got your own plan. Then a second one "to compare." You now have opinions about which model is better at vibes. You say "I had Claude look at it" in meetings as though Claude were a colleague. Claude is the only colleague who replies within four seconds, so fair enough.
Made something that actually works. It has a domain, a Stripe account and four real users, two of whom are your mum. Slightly evangelical at dinner. Your non-technical friends have started saying "anyway" a lot. You bought a mechanical keyboard. You do not type.
Moved from the chat window to the terminal and felt, briefly, like a real developer. Your rules file is longer than your CV. You say "agentic" without irony. You have stopped reading the diffs and started reading the vibes. The terminal was not discipline. It was acceleration. You are more infected than ever, but now it looks technical.
Six agents running in parallel across four repos, and you are supervising none of them. Permissions set to "yes, always, stop asking." You check on the agents from your phone at the school gate. You know to the minute when your usage limit resets and you have set an alarm for it. Friends and family have expressed concern. The agents have not.
No known cure. The agents run while you sleep and you dream in diffs. You can see the extraordinary potential and the grey sky forming behind it, and you cannot stop running towards either. You have started a newsletter about it. Obviously.